The Loneliness

 

January 23,2016

I am not alone. My Mom is not alone. Sometimes I have to remind myself of that. Alzheimer’s can be very isolating for the patient and the caregiver. I spend a good portion of my day worrying about my mom. Is she eating enough, is she eating to much, is she getting the right nutrition? On and on the worries go.

No one else can know how it feels. They try to empathize but unless they go through it with their parent they don’t truly know. I try to empathize with how isolated my mother must feel, but I truly don’t know. That is one reason the disease Alzheimer’s is so isolating.

I lie in bed at night, fearing to sleep to heavily. I need one eye open and one ear listening for Mom. The lack of good sleep reeks havoc on my body and brain. Its like having a baby all over again. Except, I am alone. I have some support. The truth being alone is almost impossible to avoid. No one can truly put themselves in my shoes. They may help a few hours here or there but they are not me. They are not responsible at level I am for my mother.

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